Stupid Pud

I realised reasonably early on that the 5p - and with inflation, 20p - pieces that my sister and I found in the Xmas pud (foil-wrapped for hygiene) were put in by my mother and didn't arrive in our bowls by magic, but it wasn't until recently (last year I think) that I figured (or was told by my mum) that they were only inserted into the dessert in the kitchen a few minutes before we ate it, rather than being baked in the pudding and the pieces for the children marked with a knife - which is what I supposed for most of my life. Anyway, nowadays I prefer trifle.

( 5th December )

Stupid Pud

I realised reasonably early on that the 5p - and with inflation, 20p - pieces that my sister and I found in the Xmas pud (foil-wrapped for hygiene) were put in by my mother and didn't arrive in our bowls by magic, but it wasn't until recently (last year I think) that I figured (or was told by my mum) that they were only inserted into the dessert in the kitchen a few minutes before we ate it, rather than being baked in the pudding and the pieces for the children marked with a knife - which is what I supposed for most of my life. Anyway, nowadays I prefer trifle.

( 5th December )

Dogwear

Since the weather got cold, I have seen a few too many canines in inappropriate dogwear. A bulldog in a child's jumper, its front legs through the arms of the sweater, another bulldog in a human pair of shorts, a terrier in what looked to be a special-made parka. A lapdog in a Burberry romper suit.

You'd never catch cats dressed up like imbeciles, no matter what humans try to do to them.

Cats manage to lose their collars as fast as 13 year olds misplace their chainstore-brand trainers; they'd soon have a tartan catcoat off of their backs. Cats don't need clothes, they just find a warm spot and stay there til March.

The story about the woman whose face was eaten off by a dog - I hope this now puts paid to the vicious cat-ist rumour that if you were to die alone, a pet dog would go for help but a pet cat would eat you.

Dogwear

Since the weather got cold, I have seen a few too many canines in inappropriate dogwear. A bulldog in a child's jumper, its front legs through the arms of the sweater, another bulldog in a human pair of shorts, a terrier in what looked to be a special-made parka. A lapdog in a Burberry romper suit.

You'd never catch cats dressed up like imbeciles, no matter what humans try to do to them.

Cats manage to lose their collars as fast as 13 year olds misplace their chainstore-brand trainers; they'd soon have a tartan catcoat off of their backs. Cats don't need clothes, they just find a warm spot and stay there til March.

The story about the woman whose face was eaten off by a dog - I hope this now puts paid to the vicious cat-ist rumour that if you were to die alone, a pet dog would go for help but a pet cat would eat you.